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For some reason people think I am their mother. Or that I am somebody's mother. Or, at least that I am motherly. Almost everyone I know has commented to this extent in some way, some time, over the years. While their comments are usually not meant to be negative, it is still something rather unpleasant to hear. Mothers are kind and good and strong, but they are also didactic and old and patterned (or at least in what they symbolize). I am 22 years old. Why would I want to be seen as a mother? I don't know, does this mean that I am boring and stagnant? Do people not do certain things around me because I am too much like their mother? Does caring about people, being friendly and organized while enjoying keeping my room clean, checking in and (every once in a while) baking cookies make me seem like a mother?

Today, my motherly-ness was brought up twice. Once when a friend kicked a piece of paper under a desk instead of picking it up, and the other when a friend wanted to "double check" with me about whether or not he could wash his baseball cap without damaging it. Both of these may seem innocent enough, but it is the context, rather, that heeds cause for alarm. I looked at friend A (the one who didn't pick up the paper) and smiled which caused her to pick it up and tell me that she has to be good around me because I am like a mother. What she didn't know is that my smile came after she bent to pick up the paper from the recognition that kicking away trash and then feeling guilty and picking it up is something that I often do. She, however, being that I am so motherly thought that my smile came pre picking up and that it referred to her neglect of doing what's right. Now, friend B agreed with me that his cap, could indeed, be washed. He even went so far as to tell me that he'd gotten other people's opinions, but he wanted to double check with me to make sure. Okay, well, who made me the washing expert? He doesn't even know me very well!

I suppose I am sort of motherly. But, I didn't think it was that obvious. I mean, both friend A and friend B are hardly my best buddies. They know me in certain contexts, but not very well. Yet, they still see me as a mother?

This sort of worries me. While I don't mind being a mother eventually, I'd rather not be one now. Mothers are no sexy (at least not to people who are not the fathers of their children). Mothers don't do fun, spontaneous things late at night (unless they're fun, spontaneous mothers, but this generally does not go hand in hand with "morality" and washing baseball caps). Mothers don't do bad things. And mothers, certainly are not 22-year-olds' best friends. All of this is highly questionable and quite a lot to think about.